Core Tenet #5: Sex and Mindfulness

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Topic: Core Tenet #5:  Sex and Mindfulness


Just like yoga and meditation, sex is a way of connecting with the Divine aspect of the Universe and is considered a sacred act. However, the sex lives of others are none of your business, as long as no harm is being done. 


This Tenet teaches that the act of sex should be reserved for those with whom we have a spiritual and philosophical connection. It is a way of growing closer to others, of sharing your mind, body, and spirit. This sharing of one’s total Self with another (or others; there’s nothing immoral about group sex), leaves you open to a powerful Divine experience. Some pagan spiritual traditions incorporate sex into their rituals, and it is beautiful. 


At the same time, we should never judge or condemn others for their sexual habits, unless they are actively hurting someone. A phrase used often in the LGBTQ community is: “Don’t yuck my yum” and I think it’s a good one. Your morals regarding sex only apply to you, not to anyone else, so keep your “yuck” to yourself. (If somebody offers you something sexual that isn’t your cup of tea, you can politely decline without making them feel like an awful person for asking.) 


American culture has always had a weird and dysfunctional relationship with sex. There are laws in various states banning all kinds of sexual behavior, from oral sex to buying a vibrator. (Which makes you wonder how they can catch you without also breaking a law against voyeurism.) But the only laws we need governing sex are laws against non-consensual sex: That in which one or more participants either did not consent, cannot consent, or withdrew consent. That’s it. Beyond that, we should all agree not to yuck anyone else’s yum. It’s nobody’s business but their own, and I suspect that some people are having oral sex in Virginia, no matter what the stupid law says. 


This Tenet requires Self-Control, Mindfulness, and Patience. With Self-Control, we can train ourselves to be Mindful and Patient with others, recognizing their freedom to express themselves sexually in their own way. 


Do you find yourself judging others because of their sexual behavior? How would you train yourself to stop? 


Namaste. 

Reverend CJ Carlin 

  

 

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